NOT A BUDDHA

QUESTION:  So, you are a buddha?

ANSWER: Certainly not. Why?

Q: I read your old post that said you are a Pratyekabuddha?

A: Ah yes. What I said was:

“A pratyekabuddha or paccekabuddha (Sanskrit and Pali, respectively), literally “a lone buddha”, “a buddha on their own” or “a private buddha”, is the so called “silent buddha” who does not try to share his realization with the world.

“Pratyekabuddhas are said to achieve enlightenment on their own, without the use of teachers or guides, by “dependent origination”.
Traditionally, Paccekabuddhas give moral teachings but not enlightenment.

“I believe this describes my state.

“See Wikipedia for more on the subject”.

Uncannily, this gives my present state of consciousness a name. But a better description would be pratyekamystic. Nevertheless, I am not a buddha, nor even a buddhist. I have of course read about Guatama’s enlightenment and buddhism in its various forms  – East Indian, Tibetan, Japanese, Chinese, but nothing ever sparked stirrings of spiritual recognition. 

In fact one of my experiences long after my 15 years of multiple  experiences of spontanious MER a year when I was a teen, was that personal guidance was alive and active in my destiny without me realising it. For instance, It expressed firm disapproval of me wandering off focus into Sufism. Practices and religions were irrelevant in my case  – Reality was and is enough. It was made deliberately clear to me that Reality is in sole charge. It ignores interpretation or interference. 

Sometime in this hidden development I was given the attributes of a pratyekamystic without any knowledge of what was happening, or effort on my part; without buddhism or sufism or anything else …

However, your question did prompt me to research the name. Now I find there is a buddhist tradition that pratyekabuddhas are put into that state to rest. I have no personal MER experience my pratyeka is a state of rest, or rest from what, so can’t say if pratyeka is a state of rest for me or not. I’d say in my case pratyeka is a state of pure focus on Reality, strictly without distractions from personal involvement in any identity, personal or collective, or any lust, anger, greed, attachments and, hopefully, ego, which is said to be the last to go. 

Q: No effort?

A: None. In my case, just reading, writing, talking and being still, listening for Reality, is enough. Reality is my passion. I try to let go of anything else. Reality is enough.

Q: But if the pratyeka state is about rest, how long does it go on for?

A: I have no idea. But then as the concept of time is merely human, in my MER experiences ‘time’ is not real, so I don’t suppose I’ll ever be given the answer to such a question, or understand it if I was …

Q: Don’t you ever feel lonely?

A: When I was young and in Reality’s development I felt alienated from humanity. I was prompted to avoid the distractions of friendships, even family, so was comparatively unsocial except in the need to earn a living.

Fortunately non-attachment was a strong fruit from my MER experiences so loneliness became meaningless as I aged. It helped I was also gifted with a love of solitude. My pursuits were solo  – sailing, horse riding, reading and writing. The nearest I got to sharing sports was in squash, racquet ball and swimming.  

I was also helped with the continuing gift of a 45 year marriage to an extraordinarily compatible character and personality. So far as loneliness is concerned, my understanding wife has assuaged that, her companionship has been enough …  (I checked for hidden wings on her back but she assures me what I found are just shoulder blades …). LOL.

Mysticexperiences.net 

AN UNANSWERED CORRESPONDENCE

CORRESPONDENT:

“It sounds as though you have reached a plateau of tranquility where life’s many vagaries are neatly pigeonholed away. Well done you!

“For myself I am still riding life’s dodgems but enjoying the experience very greatly.”

COMMENT:

“Life’s many vagaries” have not been “pigeonholed away”. There is nothing to pigeon hole as any thoughtful examination of one’s personal attachments will attest.

Human vagaries are artificial, mind stuff, unreal, harmless unless taken seriously like Nazism was, for instance, by the young men mostly in their twenties, mostly educated and professionals, who managed Nazi atrocities from Himmler’s headquarters in Albrecht Strasse for instance.

Anyway, history shows human empires only last 250 years before slumping into material, moral and religious decadence if Sir John Glubb is to be believed in his essay, THE FATE OF EMPIRES and SEARCH FOR SURVIVAL.

But the Reality of the mystical experience of Reality is known even from human records to be at least 12,000 years old. According to the Reality of the mystic experience of Reality (MER), Reality created everything, everything known and unknown. Reality created history. Accordingly, Reality is far more reliable, trustworthy, and loving than anything human by comparison.

Mind stuff is easily dismissed personally (not so easily socially!). It  is seen to be non existent upon close and persistent examination unless one is attached to it.

According to the mystic experience, there is much more to being human than the myths upon which transient human life exists, much more to existence than being merely human.

As for, “I am still riding life’s dodgems but enjoying the experience very greatly” – is that a sad admission of a lost soul’s commitment to a lifetime of nothing but empty pleasure, hedonism?

Mysticexperiences.net

TO LIVE A GOOD AND MEANINGFUL LIFE

Q:  How can I live a good and meaningful life?

A:   What do you mean, “a good and meaningful life”?

Q:  I was hoping you’d tell me. 

A:   Well, you can relax because no one knows. If they say they do it’s all surmise. Even the Stoics left it to circumstances.

In the meantime we know collectivism doesn’t work, neither do Socialism or Communism on the evidence despite what young students are told to think. However sincere, religions haven’t got it, science by definition can’t get it, and morality and ethics are historically human cultural accretions of their place and times – moveable feasts, irrelevant in Reality.

Q:   Don’t you have a personal creed, a philosophy, rules?

A:    So far as the world is concerned, I try to be legal, decent (do no physical or mental harm), and honest. That seems to keep me safe from humans.

Q:    Is that all your Reality demands from you?

A:    It’s not just my Reality! It’s not anybody’s exclusive Reality!

The Reality that is all things, the Reality I have experienced, makes no demands. It never takes, only gives. It is everything and everything is It.

Why do you ask about rules for life anyway?

Q:    In the past you have referred to those who “thirst and hunger”. I think I’m one of them … it’s a constant demand I can’t meet.

A:     What do you think it is?

Q:    I don’t know. I’ve been mentally restless since childhood and it’s been getting worse. I thought someone like you might know.

A:     I think you know what this hunger and thirst is.

Q:    Well, for a reason to exist I guess? What are we doing here? Am I supposed to be doing something? It persists, it dominates my mind, drives me mad sometimes, angry. It interferes with my job, my family,  friends and future. I feel as if I’m looking for something but I don’t know what. I’ve tried to tell people but always stop. Sometimes I think I’m mad. What am I supposed to do?

A:   You sound like a Seeker. You’re called.

Q:   (Questioner jolts and presses his hands into his eyes, holds his breath, shakes uncontrollably). 

OH!

A:  (Later). You are a Seeker. The mystic experience is that Seekers are created by Reality and that Reality then supplies the answers. Nothing  else can. You are called.

Q: (Whispers). Can you help me?

A:  If that’s what your passionate restlessness is, you already have help. You don’t have to do anything. Let go of everything. Just be still, be absolutely silent, go into the Silence you’ll find in being silent, resist all human attachments. As you rid yourself of these weeds you will fill with Reality. Your restless seeking will be satisfied. This is the remedy from the experience of the mystics.

(Later).  Ignore the early tendencies to use human sense to understand what’s happening to you. Those are the remnants of your old attachments. They only grew by default in the first place because of the  absence of your true self.

Reality does not need nor accept your help. Humans are not in charge of this process. Human, worldly experience has no place now. You are on your way. Reality is remorseless but benign, unendingly accepting. Reality never fails. It is utterly reliable over anything else you will ever know.

Forget about leading “a good and meaningful life”. In Reality, the truly good and meaningful life will become axiomatic, automatic, without you even noticing or taking heed if you do. All else is mind stuff, merely human, not for you any more.

Mysticexperiences.net

SOCIAL UNREST – A MYSTIC VIEW

A lot of the unrest among all classes of underperformers in all races and cultures comes from the mistaken belief we’re all equal when manifestly we’re not.

What needs to be supplied in practical abundance is equality of opportunity for all to see. A real application of this principle of equality of opportunity for all, regardless of race, culture or religion will soon spread the obvious realisation we are not all capable of equality.

At present, when found to be practically untrue this myth of equality enrages the ego, hubris, envy and greed. Then logic and reason are discarded for anarchy, violation of logic and reason, and violence.

This is a historical state of human affairs. It’s not new. We can only wait for Darwin’s evolutionary processes to dispense with this lust, anger, greed, attachments and ego, as the mystics say is already happening, or use now available DNA surgery to rid ourselves of our primitive stages quicker than Nature is allowing!

Such social eruptions as epitomised by the failures of mankind’s attempts to correct the situation have only resulted in the failures of Ananias and Sephira of the Bible and the liberalism, socialism and communism of our day – all of which eventually fell or are falling under the weight of their own evil.

The human hierarchy adjusts itself according to its seminal individual merits, not anything racial, cultural or collective – as we saw and still see in various stages in the old USSR, China, Vietnam, Cuba, and Venezuela. All is well.

In the meantime, is the answer simply to observe and endure, control our outrage and collect enough passports to keep out of the worst – as the developed families of the middle and far east have done for generations – while democracy and capitalism, perhaps tweaked, continue to pour out our grasping wants with our necessary needs?

Mysticexperiences.net

THINGS THAT ‘NEED’ TO BE DONE.

Despite most minds insisting on doing everything that ‘needs’ doing, not everything does.

On the contrary, simplification to the barest of necessities is the essence of the Mystical Experience of Reality, (MER). Even ordinary lives are enhanced by simplicity.

Being enthralled by being human is not what life is about. Mystics don’t have bucket lists. Nor are their minds on default.

Humans dream up ‘things’ that ‘need’ to be done, keep them busy, entertained, that on examination aren’t necessary to human existence, contentment or even happiness. They’re mind stuff; disappointments, clutter, distractions and blockages.

Sadly, they operate on such mythomanic self destructive behaviour 99.00%-recurring of the short time they’re human while the bliss of human self fulfillment is in the other direction – not entrapping themselves with such habitual, invasive behaviour.

So while most humans automatically copy what other humans are doing, bear in mind this Blog is addressed to those others – mystics, seekers, academics and scientists burrowing into what they call, “the hard question” of scientific experiment versus mystic experience. Their minds are independent, ready and open to simplification and focus on the profundities of existence.

Therefore, some of what appears here, including this post, will not ‘speak to the condition’ of everyone, as Quakers might say, while others will find their lives simplified, their “cups running over” with increasing fulfillment, their “hunger and thirst” quenched.

As we are not all equal so some won’t achieve their fulfillment in MER because they are addicted to busyness, distractions, self indulgences  – “doing everything that needs to be done”.

mysticexperiences.net

ALL IS WELL but …

Once you begin not taking human behaviour seriously you’ll be amazed how it wont make any discernible difference to human reality but will make you feel lighter than air.

If the old saying is true that angels are lighter than air because they have no worries, is this because they have the mystic insight that All Is Well?

Does that mean once you get that mystic insight too you get your halo? (LOL).

Or is there anything else from which you still need to be detached?

Sadly, that’d be like taking a delicately floating silk scarf from thorns without damaging it, oh soooo patiently …

mysticexperiences.net

ULTIMATE REALITY

The program Ultimate Reality, a popular and successful program by and about scientists has been publicly available on YouTube for many years. A neurosurgeon asks famous world scientists from physicists to theologians, neuroscientists, philosophers, psychology professors and academicians and so on for specific answers about Ultimate Reality.

The current issue probes the following:

IS ULTIMATE REALITY LIMITED TO THE PHYSICAL WORLD?

MER answers: No, it’s not.

The mystic experience is that Reality is everything known and unknown, understood or not understood, in charge, benign, helpful, understanding, accepting, caring, directing and nurturing with no beginning or end and we are part of It.

There is a strong divide among scientists and academics on this question. Simply put, some believe human experience is all there is. They are wrong. The experiences of the mystics throughout history show that.

So scientists and academics are currently much caught up in the new buzz word, consciousness – human awareness of what really exists.

This creates a chasm between such scientists and mystics that leading young physicist Dr David Chalmers might be including in his introduction to the subject when he says this abyss is the “hard question” physics faces today. His suggestion has caused a re-emergence of the hubbub between the materialists versus the perennialists.

The perennialists lean towards the mystic experience, especially in the ancient experiences of the east. They say it is so pervasive a human experience, of human consciousness (?), it cannot be ignored. (One published academic wrote to Keith recently admitting to his own personal experiences with the mystic experience which he could not write about because of the academic constraints of his university).

So it’s a stand off with no easy compromise because the mystic experience is by definition ineffable, which according to WordWeb is ” an adjective defying expression or description … indefinable, indescribable, undescribable, unspeakable, untellable, unutterable, inexpressible, unexpressible, too sacred to be uttered … unnameable, unsayable …”

So where will this impasse go? As a mystic my intuition is Reality will assert itself as it sees fit. It will continue ignoring mere human curiosity –  scientific, academic or otherwise …

ULTIMATE REALITY: Will the universe ever end?

MER: The stage of primitive evolution humanity presently occupies is vividly illuminated by this question because the answer is that the universes are mere inhabitants in a Reality beyond any such thing as what humans call ‘infinity’.

The human brain, or human consciousness, is not developed enough to comprehend this yet. In present human experience everything is finite. But nothing is finite to a mystic. ‘Infinity’ is just another human supposition.

ULTIMATE REALITY: What, if anything, exists after death?

MER: Nothing! That is, nothing that would match human understanding at this stage.

However, despite no body, brain or ‘mind’, humans after ‘death’ are as infinite as the Reality itself of which it is part. So humans after ‘death’ will share a humanly unknown joy, belongingness, ultimate acceptance, and knowledge of all existence. They will not want to revert to any other state.

ULTIMATE REALITY: Why are religions so pervasive across diverse human cultures?

MER: Religions are a human construct built on supposition, not on the mystic experience of Reality.

MER is caught, not taught. Nowadays, religions are reduced to morality and ethics, empty faith, hope and belief in the absence of this mystical experience except for dead-end study of it. You can’t get the experience of Reality by studying it. That, as one notable but generally unheard of Sufi master said, “is like eating the menu, not the food…”  Reality is real. Religions are barely recognisable imitations, false.

Also, there is a difference in being called to a religion and in being called by Reality.

The call to a religion is a personal, human need, usually emotional and powered by lust, anger, greed, attachments (or lack of them), ego or hubris. The call by Reality on the other hand has nothing to do with being human. It calls, you go! Whoever or whatever you are. Just like that!

For different approaches to the subject, here is ULTIMATE REALITY’S YouTube URL

mysticexperiences.net

DISCERNMENT 

Explaining A Mystic.

Me:  Thank you for your introduction to the current affairs essayist. I’m not much interested in worldy affairs. There is much more afoot than being merely human.

Questioner: GONADS! You are SUPER interested in what Trump’s doing, and Boris too… or at least that’s the picture you paint. And the whole Covid melodrama! And what about your sport of choice: sailing!

Me: Confusing I know, but my interest in human affairs is very shallow because with 99% of the people who do manage to get into my life or be in it uninvited, I’ve got used to using such expected conversations of the day to make myself invisible. I have no defining passion for humans. There is nothing of Real value to study in human existence for people like me.

This gift of discernment can upset former friends because I’m reclusive, have drifted out of their lives. I find them irritatingly, wearily superfluous. I increasingly see this discernment focusing me powerfully so as to protect my first hand experiences of a Reality far beyond the human condition.

There are very few people near to me now compared to the hundred or so deliberately pruned out of my existence.

Current human affairs are more and more of a curiosity to me, an entertainment, a shallow archeological peculiarity, a recreation, a time consuming hobby easily discarded.

You’re practically the only one left to experience my small talk when challenged, something I was only gifted with suddenly in my forties – presumbably to make my life with humans less miserable.

This small talk ability worked then but has become much less needed. So resist stirring it up. LOL.

Questioner: That’s a great explanation. I get it.

The apparent contradiction was confusing before. That clears it up.

Thank you.

mysticexperiences.net

PSYCHODELIC DRUGS TO INDUCE MER?

NO! Absolutely not.

Not even as an entheogen!  – a psychoactive plant or chemical used to experience the Mystical Experience of Reality (MER), or take for ‘spiritual’ or ‘religious’ uses.

Drugs work on the brain. But the brain does not induce MER. Nothing humans can do can induce MER.

Reality uses the brain to receive MER. The brain is for this purpose a receiver not an originator, if my experiences are to be trusted.

All drugs of any such kind interfere with Reality’s perpetual  communication through the brain, whether unobserved, or overtly observed like MER.

Such drugs might have emotional effects. But emotion is a human attribute and plays no part in MER. Emotion does not fulfill our destiny in Reality, whereas MER delivers personal existential, fulfillment – a destiny far beyond being merely human.

Neither can such drugs deliver what traditionally, spontaneously experienced MER’s deliver permanently. On the contrary they are often reported to deliver destructive, crippling brain effects as well as unwanted enhancement of human attributes such as ego and hubris, even fear. Their strange negative effects can linger.

In the old days belief in or teaching of the existence of Shaitan, the Devil, was commonplace. The Devil opposed what humans knew as “God” in those days. The “Devil” spread the “evil” that humans don’t need “God”, that humans are enough in themselves and can enjoy the material things of the earth without “God” because that’s all that exists. In many ways, the same old battle exists today in other words …

In the meantime, the process of MER, known or unknown, is inexorable, with or without our belief in it, or our help.

All Is Well.

Mysticexperiences.net

April 2020

SPONTANEOUS AWAKENING EXPERIENCES: BEYOND RELIGION AND SPIRITUAL PRACTICE

By: Steve Taylor, M. Sc., PGCE Leeds, United Kingdom

This academic paper appears to describe the experience of my spontaneous, unrelated religious or spiritual experiences of what I call MER, (Mystical Experience of Reality) every year for over 15 years.

I thought you might be intrigued by this investigation into and conclusion about the phenomenon. The abstract of the paper follows. The full paper is available in pdf., free of charge, from Academia.edu as well as on the author’s website.

ABSTRACT

“‘Awakening experiences’ have been misunderstood to some degree by their long association with religious and spiritual traditions and practices. The research reported here –161 reports of awakening experiences –suggests that most of them occurred outside the context of spiritual or religious traditions. Neither were they induced by spiritual practices such as meditation or prayer. Most occurred ‘spontaneously.'”

Mysticexperieces.net

March 2020

INTUITION

A baffled medical specialist came looking for me at the hospital coffee shop to demand, in my mid-sip: “You’re a mystic … what’s your intuition on this?”

My emergency room had been visited by doctors and many nurses ever since my admission. They wanted to examine the gyrating blood pressure monitor above my bed. Apparently the chaos of my pulse was not connected to any mental or physical symptoms. They repeatedly asked me if I was alright. I said I was.

Someone told me the medical staff and nurses crowded in to add the experience to their professional education …

However, the heart specialist was finding it difficult to establish a professionally safe, defensible medical reason to keep me hospitalised with a portable monitor as I was by then – or should he risk sending me home without diagnosis or treatment?

He waited for my answer, so I said:  “Send me home. Have me checked out regularly.”

So he did. I’m fine. As I intuited, the pulse irregularities appear to have been just a delayed settling down of the system after a previous surgical procedure to eradicate cholesterol build up. I am not a young chicken …

This incident got me thinking about the intuition mystics are said to have.

I think intuition is a human word describing how mystics see widely experienced things humans also see but don’t notice, that intuition is “an ineffable conscious experience, as distinct from any physical or computational process*”.  Intuition seems as common to humans, as their blindness to it.

Is intuition a largely veiled part of ordinary human evolution, Reality at work, starting with the animals that seem to have an abundance of basic survival intuition, whereas most humans are biased against anything not widely experienced or accepted by their cultures – collective blindness?

Will intuition generally develop through basic intelligence, to full blown attributes of intuitive observation, conclusion, action and communication? Will languages die? Is this intuitive process part of the evolutionary process?

Are mystics the only ones currently developed enough to use intuition as part of their daily lives?

As mystics know, in Reality, in which all things are perfect, there are no names or languages. Could this mean intuition is the language of Reality?

Is intuition the human  ‘eureka’ principle, those sudden, logically and intellectually unsupported sudden scientific discoveries we hear so much about?

Is intuition the human word to describe the ineffable experience of MER?  Mystics would say partly, yes, because any experience, particularly the experience of the Mystic Experience of Reality, is the beginning of all wisdom.

*Wordweb dictionary for ‘ineffability’.

Mysticexperiences.net

MYSTICISM, PRACTICAL V. THEORETICAL?

“Mysticism is practical, not theoretical.” – Evelyn Underhill

Evelyn Underhill in “Mysticism: The nature and development of spiritual consciousness”, Oxford 1994, 82

 

I disagree. My mystical experiences have never lead me to enact any kind of practical use of the phenomenon, or regard it as a theory.

Scientists, academics, theologists and religionists who examine the phenomenon give the impression there is such a thing as practical or even theoretical mysticism. There isn’t. They simply haven’t experienced the mystical experience of Reality (MER).

They give the feeliing it is correct to expect something of human use from the phenomena, like rules of conduct, morality, ethics, commandments, worship, devotion, prohibitions, even drugs or mind shifting dances; at the very least some stages of human attainment.

Sadly not, if my experiences are to be believed. I had the experiences throughout every one of my years from about 14 years of age to the age of 35 or so.

I did not experience any practical demands then or since, any more than a tulip would demand to know what its existence is all about … the unfolding message for me is to ignore anything human as a distraction. That has been one of the gifts of Reality – a freedom beyond expression.

The only answer I got when I ‘demanded’ to be told what was expected of me was: “Nothing. Reality is in charge. Reality does everything. All Is Well.”

This revelation might not measure up to the utilitarian demands humans make of their experiences and revelations in life, but there it is. According to my experiences It is what It is, make of it what you can.

MER is not theoretical either. The key to understanding Reality is experience of Reality! A corollary.

All else is what George Fox the founder of Quakerism (a suspiciously Western imitation of Sufism) referred to as “notionalising”.

But even George Fox couldn’t overcome his instinct for the human need for utilitarianism. He thought his MERs demanded extreme simplicity – a Quaker morality, ethic, place, manner of worship, and clothing.

Fox really does appear to have been a mystic. But did he, like most of the mystics before and after him, wrongly believe MER was meant to be evangelised, or practised, or even could be?

My intuition is that “practical mysticism” or “theoretical mysticism” are mythomanical human inventions, nothing to do with Reality. In spiritual terms there are no such things as “practical or theoretical mysticism”.

Mysticexperiences.net

ACADEMIA POURING OUT CONJECTURE ON MYSTICISM

Academia.edu tells me the web page has found 25,450 papers on comparative mysticism written by academics in leading universities around the world.

I’ve downloaded and read three. If these are anything to go by, academia is merely pouring out papers on mysticism that are cannibalised from other works, some famous, some obscure, some historical, some newer – with conjecture and commentary thrown in using jargon presumably aimed at other academics who will be deciding the authors’ academic reputations/careers. (Is Dr David Chalmers’ plea for science and academia to jettison jargon falling on barren ground?).

Not all the conjecture and commentary is new or originally expressed, either. Nevertheless, the impression is given of a wider and growing scientific/academic acceptance of the phenomena and its main attributes. I don’t know if this is a good or relevant thing or not. My experience is that Reality, having given existence all it needs, isn’t much distracted by human wants.

None of the three papers I read claim any actual experience of the mystical experience of Reality, (MER).

Based on my multiple annual experiences of MER over 15 years or so I conjecture that those who have had MER are receivers of an outer, non biological ineffable experience, and are not mere generators of MER based on their human wishes, experiences, brains, minds, consciousnesses, or souls as some of these works suggest.

Where did and do these wild assertive imaginings come from?

Mysticexperiences.net

MYSTICISM A FORM OF KNOWLEDGE NOT FELT BY THE RATIONAL MIND?

I can think of no better definition of mysticism than that I found in a comment by Anna Nimm on a website called Materialism, Mysticism and Art

I think of mysticism as direct knowledge of god, whether a personal or a pantheistic god synonymous with nature or a Dionysian life force. And it’s a form of union that is ecstatic, it transports one both beyond the self and also beyond concepts and words; it is a form of knowledge felt by the heart and body (or soul) rather than by the rational mind.

From “Mysticism – experience over intellect”, Follower Anthony Garner’s WELTANSCHUANG blog.

ADVICE TO ONE OF THIS BLOG’S FOLLOWERS

I’m sorry if I was cryptic. It was against all my instincts to say anything at all (check out the description of a “silent Buddha” in the Blog).

The cryptic formula I used (as explained in the Blog somewhere) is designed to guide the recipient to their own conclusions rather than have it all spelled out as mere hearsay. So I’m pleased you’re going to persist in untangling my words until you get to the hoped for personal epiphanic arrangement …

(This exercise is profoundly more bountiful than any crossword or version of sudoku, especially for you as the hungry and thirsting Seeker I believe you to be).

As a supposed pratyeka buddha I was diffident about interfering but did so because it seems to me you are on the very edge of Realisation, and indeed, very often experience Its fringes without recognising It. This conflict ruins your inner content.

The tradition is that we do not evoke our “voice”, this incessant passion for Reality, our vocation, with all our heart and soul and strength, Reality chooses us. It will never leave us, It is now us.

So, you ask, what do I do? This is a very typical egoistic human response – to which Reality’s reply is: Nothing.

If you are truly called, have total integrity and sincerity, are a real seeker, then everything will be done for you. Reality takes over. From my own experience I can agree with the taught tradition that you will change – friends, jobs, clothes, eating habits, reading, travel, lust, anger, greed, all personal, cultural and institutional attachments and lastly, and with difficulty, ego. (I see some of these are already working on you quite vehemently!).

I did not find my processing “in the mills of God which grind slowly but infinitely finely” as I’ve heard it called, easy, though looking back I can see how silently effortless, sometimes unnoticed and unremarked the changes were in my life. I am much blessed.

So in your case I would say “simplicity” and “action”, as well as its coconmitant “non action”, are now seeded in you …

What now? In the immediate meantime it helps to go into the silence and stay there as long as you can whenever you can and let the world go by. This facility develops with repetition. It’s a very calming place to be while Reality nurtures you into full fruition. All is well.

I hope this is more helpful in rescuing you from the world. I’m very diffident about interfering in something so personal and hope I’m right in trying.

My very best wishes,

Keith.