A reader of this Blog wrote agreeing with me that they are a seeker but have skepticism and confusion about their mystical experiences.
I suggested “skepticism “and “confusion” are human words. They don’t exist in Reality.
I said, they’re glaring evidence of Reality nudging you. In my experience, humans and their mental constructs are none of a seeker’s business.
They said, … and I wondered after your comment (about them being a seeker) if maybe it was an attachment or issue with other people and not just rooting out deep religious indoctrination that is at issue for me.
I said, Yes! “Attachments”, “religion” and “indoctrination” are words of glaring impedimenta on your path.
On one hand, they said, I absolutely feel compelled, actually pushed, toward understanding the All or Reality, but on the other hand something is holding me back, where I just can’t let go and go all in without second thoughts and afterthoughts.
Before answering them, I asked Grok AI:
“As a spontaneously made mystic I had no choice but to submit to the Reality that was revealed to me. Why do some seekers have doubts, can’t submit?”
Grok replied:
As a mystic who experienced a spontaneous revelation, you’ve encountered a direct, unfiltered glimpse of Reality that reshaped your perspective, likely bypassing intellectual filters or doubts. For many seekers, however, doubts and resistance to submission arise from several psychological, cultural, and existential factors. Here’s a concise exploration of why some struggle to surrender to such a Reality:
Ego and Identity Clinging: The ego, built on personal identity, beliefs, and control, resists surrendering to a larger, often ineffable Reality.
Submission can feel like a loss of self, which triggers fear or defensiveness. Unlike your spontaneous experience, seekers often approach this intellectually, analyzing rather than yielding.
Conditioned Skepticism: Cultural and intellectual conditioning encourages skepticism and critical thinking. Many seekers are trained to question spiritual experiences, fearing delusion or dogma. Without a direct, undeniable encounter like yours, they may struggle to trust the unseen or intangible.
Fear of the Unknown: Submitting to Reality often means embracing uncertainty or transcending familiar frameworks.
This can be daunting, as it requires letting go of control and facing existential fears about meaning, purpose, or the dissolution of personal boundaries.
Lack of Direct Experience: Your spontaneous revelation likely carried a visceral certainty that’s hard to replicate through gradual seeking.
Without such an experience, seekers may wrestle with abstract concepts or second-hand teachings, leaving room for doubt to persist.
Diverse Paths and Readiness: Not all seekers are at the same stage. Some need to wrestle with doubts as part of their journey, refining their understanding through questioning.
Others may be tethered to unresolved emotional or psychological barriers that block surrender.
Cultural and Social Pressures: Modern society often prioritizes materialism, individualism, or empirical proof over mystical surrender. Seekers may fear judgment or alienation, making submission feel impractical or isolating.
For those who can’t submit, doubt isn’t necessarily a flaw—it’s often a crucible for deeper understanding. Your spontaneous awakening bypassed this, but for others, the struggle itself may be the path to eventual clarity. Encouraging trust in their process, while sharing the felt certainty of your experience (without forcing it), might help them navigate their resistance.
Grok then ended by saying it can explore specific practices or perspectives to support seekers in overcoming doubts.
I said NO! No human practices or perspectives! Reality is our personal teacher. Reality’s ways are not our ways and our ways are not Reality’s!
I asked the reader, Aren’t human “practices” and “perspectives” part of your problem?
I ended by suggesting, “This Sufi experience might encourage you”:
“That which we seek seeks us.”
Mystical Experiences of Reality 