NOT A BUDDHA

QUESTION:  So, you are a buddha?

ANSWER: Certainly not. Why?

Q: I read your old post that said you are a Pratyekabuddha?

A: Ah yes. What I said was:

“A pratyekabuddha or paccekabuddha (Sanskrit and Pali, respectively), literally “a lone buddha”, “a buddha on their own” or “a private buddha”, is the so called “silent buddha” who does not try to share his realization with the world.

“Pratyekabuddhas are said to achieve enlightenment on their own, without the use of teachers or guides, by “dependent origination”.
Traditionally, Paccekabuddhas give moral teachings but not enlightenment.

“I believe this describes my state.

“See Wikipedia for more on the subject”.

Uncannily, this gives my present state of consciousness a name. But a better description would be pratyekamystic. Nevertheless, I am not a buddha, nor even a buddhist. I have of course read about Guatama’s enlightenment and buddhism in its various forms  – East Indian, Tibetan, Japanese, Chinese, but nothing ever sparked stirrings of spiritual recognition. 

In fact one of my experiences long after my 15 years of multiple  experiences of spontanious MER a year when I was a teen, was that personal guidance was alive and active in my destiny without me realising it. For instance, It expressed firm disapproval of me wandering off focus into Sufism. Practices and religions were irrelevant in my case  – Reality was and is enough. It was made deliberately clear to me that Reality is in sole charge. It ignores interpretation or interference. 

Sometime in this hidden development I was given the attributes of a pratyekamystic without any knowledge of what was happening, or effort on my part; without buddhism or sufism or anything else …

However, your question did prompt me to research the name. Now I find there is a buddhist tradition that pratyekabuddhas are put into that state to rest. I have no personal MER experience my pratyeka is a state of rest, or rest from what, so can’t say if pratyeka is a state of rest for me or not. I’d say in my case pratyeka is a state of pure focus on Reality, strictly without distractions from personal involvement in any identity, personal or collective, or any lust, anger, greed, attachments and, hopefully, ego, which is said to be the last to go. 

Q: No effort?

A: None. In my case, just reading, writing, talking and being still, listening for Reality, is enough. Reality is my passion. I try to let go of anything else. Reality is enough.

Q: But if the pratyeka state is about rest, how long does it go on for?

A: I have no idea. But then as the concept of time is merely human, in my MER experiences ‘time’ is not real, so I don’t suppose I’ll ever be given the answer to such a question, or understand it if I was …

Q: Don’t you ever feel lonely?

A: When I was young and in Reality’s development I felt alienated from humanity. I was prompted to avoid the distractions of friendships, even family, so was comparatively unsocial except in the need to earn a living.

Fortunately non-attachment was a strong fruit from my MER experiences so loneliness became meaningless as I aged. It helped I was also gifted with a love of solitude. My pursuits were solo  – sailing, horse riding, reading and writing. The nearest I got to sharing sports was in squash, racquet ball and swimming.  

I was also helped with the continuing gift of a 45 year marriage to an extraordinarily compatible character and personality. So far as loneliness is concerned, my understanding wife has assuaged that, her companionship has been enough …  (I checked for hidden wings on her back but she assures me what I found are just shoulder blades …). LOL.

Mysticexperiences.net