If you are called, you “hunger and thirst after righteousness” as the Christian bible puts it. The feeling persists. It is a lifetime’s passion.
Not many people are called. But satisfying this hunger and thirst is your life’s quest. (It’s development had little or no obvious human connection in my case).
This hunger and thirst is a direct experience of Reality’s existence. You are a Seeker.
People like you become more spiritual than human …
As Professor Harold Bloom the expert on gnosticism* at Yale University said, you are one of the “elite”, (a title that offends the uninvited, the non elite. It is not used by Seekers or Mystics).
Marsha Sinetar in her book, ORDINARY PEOPLE AS MYSTICS AND MONKS called such people, “a species within a species”.
The phenomenon of being called seems to have persisted in human development from the beginning, as ancient texts show.
Such people find it difficult to adjust to living in the world. However, as they begin to know themselves their attitudes and values change into ‘Ahas’s’ of discovery of self.
Such people become discriminating, see and know all things. As a consequence, they happily let go, relax, “Let go and let God” as one Quaker Elder put it.
They are different. Their ways are not the world’s ways. The world’s ways are not their ways.
Their ways become Reality’s ways.
* Gnostics believe that human beings contain something of ‘God’, the highest good.
All Is Well